Hi Y’all! 

It’s day +25 and my counts are looking good!  My energy level seemed to be improving day by day last week,  but this week…. Its staying flat at 90 year old lady level.

I have gotten out much more.  I didn’t really “get out” of the car much,  but went for rides a lot and that was nice.   It helped with the cabin fever.  Rosie left for Arizonia with Fran and Dan today.  She is the flower girl in our friend Heather and Scott’s wedding.  My parents and I were so disappointed we couldn’t go,  but I need to heal and it is still way too unsafe. I am going to miss my baby.  I just got her back!   

I also started getting some deliveries of things I bought while in the hospital.  It’s always fun to get packages I have no recollection of buying…. Ahhhhhh……… Hospital pain killers….

The last few days I’ve been having issues with my legs.  It is very hard to explain the feeling. It’s as if I can feel my legs all the time, yet not in a pleasant way.  It is worse when I’m still  and even worse when I try to sleep.  Apparently,  this is not uncommon.  It is just very difficult to sleep or relax.  Baths help,  but there are only so many you can take.  I had 4 between 10PM and 5AM today. I have a large staircase I have to go up to get to my bedroom and I fear that may be part of the issue. I’m overdoing it.  But like every other weird thing that comes my way, I’m sure this will pass.   My consistent shaking has let up some.  

I find he worst part of this HSCT recovery for me is that my mind wants to do things and my body is completely unable to.  It is beyond frustrating…. But I am trying to be patient and heal… It’s not easy feeling useless and watching others around me go on as normal.   I want to help!!!

Xoxo

Colleen

PS – miss her already